The Moynahan Aniston Variey Scare Me

Bianca My Dear,

Happy week after Valentine’s Day!  How was your and Preston’s night?  Did you do anything super romantic around the SLC?  New guy and I had an excellent night.  We hit up Ruth’s Diner (super low key and romantic), drank way too much wine and exchanged gifts.  I’ve never been so spoiled by someone other than my Dad (which is a really good sign, no?).  He treats me like the Prius Owning Princess that I am and I loves it.

New Guy brought up a commitment again this weekend, and I again, wiggled my way out of it.  It’s not that I’m scared to commit to him.  It’s that I’m scared sh*tless to commit to him.  I definitely care about him, don’t want to date other dudes and can only see things moving in a good direction (at a sloths pace, of course), but my relationship history is one of the most rocky this side of the Rockies; therefore, I’m keeping our relationship in a state of noncommittal bliss as long as possible.  I just worry that my not wanting to be his girlfriend is going to hurt his feelings and our chances in the future. {sigh}

Poor Bridget Moynaham.  Your email got me thinking a lot about my not-so-lucky partner in name.  Yikes.  She’s definitely on the downhill (even though she’s still a thousand times hotter than 99% of the population) and not getting younger or luckier.  And dude, don't even get me started on Aniston.  She's the most perfect person ever (from where I'm standing).  What's wrong with her? Why is she so unlucky?  She must have sold her soul to the devil to get the Rachel Role.  And we all know that soul selling is bad karma.  What if that happens to one of us later in life?  You think you’re totally set with some awesome dude, find yourself pregnant and unmarried (but it’s totally okay because it’s the hip thing to do these days, thanks Johnny Depp and Goldie Hawn) and then WHAM!  Your man is gone with someone hotter than you.  {Sigh}.  At least when Hacking cheated on me, I was hotter than the “other woman,” still under 25 and awesome (duh), thus, came out on top of the situation, but… it still sucked.

Being cheated on, deceived and in some ways totally taken advantage of totally did a number on my mental state and self esteem.  I think I rebounded fairly quickly, but the first two weeks I was an absolute mess.  Luckily, I wasn’t pregnant, never really felt that I was passionately in love with Hacking and have probably the best support system in the world.  …But I was still an absolute disaster.  (Again, lucky for me Bummer Bridget meant chain smoking plus Jack Daniels minus food and equaled the hottest I looked in a long time.)

I guess the point I’m trying to make is that as much as it sucked, I’m still super young and therefore it was not that traumatic. But what if it happens a decade or two from now?  Are you supposed to always plan on the ‘what if’s’ of being alone no matter what, or, do you trust completely and plan only for your significant other to be in your life?

I’m so incredibly happy you and Preston have each other and you’re completely confident and comfortable in your relationship and the love you have for each other, but do you have a back up?  Do you know what you would do if things went totally south?  Or do you not even think about it? 

Sorry for the plethora of questions… I guess I’m just curious when (if ever) I’ll be ready for a relationship.  Obviously, marriage is not a prospect for me at the time.  I definitely agree that The Asian could be the first down the aisle.  I must say, I’m very proud of our group of friends for ignoring the marriage pressure in the Salt Lake City area.  I’d say that over 80% of the people from my high school are married and most already have children.  Blech! 

In other news:  Remind me never to be trapped in a closed space (read: car, elevator, football stadium, city) with QDW and her ex.  My gawd.  I was trapped in the back seat of the ex’s car with him driving and QDW navigating.  Not only are they hella annoying (she has a different tone with him, a much higher pitched frequency of "babe") but she was giving directions (and seemed to have a problem knowing right from left).  Their disagreements, tiffs and general conversations had nothing to do with me, but I felt like I needed to pop an entire bottle of Xanax to be in their company.  I may have left claw marks on his leather seats.  Love him.  Love her.  But never again will I volunteer to be in their combined presence.  Here’s another question:  How can two totally awesome people be so incredibly awful together? 

Your Relationship Challenged and Quizzical Comrade,

Bridget